Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Finding Nemo: "Just keep swimming": (Day 4)

How do you keep going in life when Migraine or another Headache Disorder deals you a difficult set back?

   When I first became seriously disabled and I was forced out of school, I just, well, didn't deal. I shut down. I went into a total depressive funk and proceeded to basically sleep for two years straight to try and escape the pain, and the situation. It didn't work. I succeeded in making myself more sensitive to the pain, not less, as I would be incoherent for up to 20 hours a day, but when I was awake, I didn't have time to get used to the pain. So it I was basically either asleep and floating, or in awake and sinking.  So that didn't work.

   Then they made me wake up, and I didn't have a choice except to learn how to swim. I learned that, whether physically, emotionally, or mentally, I had to keep pushing the water in my face past me and get through it. Yes, there would be more water the push against my face in a moment, but, after so many pushes, I "earned" a chance to float, to relax, to pop back up and breathe. But buoyancy has a limited number of virtues, and back under the water I'd go, pushing one obstacle after another out of my path.

     Because if you don't, you'll just go nowhere.

Quantum in me fuit,

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